Bitterness/Forgiveness

In this study on bitterness and forgiveness we want to look at the how destructive properties of bitterness can affect our lives and our relationship with God. Bitterness is an act in which “injury” to our physical or spiritual self is created. And of course we as well create bitterness and inflict “injury” to others. Forgiveness is the “remedy” for bitterness so we will address forgiveness and the importance of it as well.

The variables of bitterness are nearly endless. We harbor bitterness against others, against God, and we can have bitterness against our self. Bitterness can come from an individual, or a group of people.

Bitterness can manifest itself within our own mind against someone that we know or don’t know. Often times, bitterness can develop where the person “inflicting” injury has no knowledge of the bitterness being created within us. Bitterness can start through every avenue of the media. Sometimes only a few spoken words can inflict injury to someone creating bitterness. Often times we “create” this bitterness in someone else’s life do to our negative reaction or reactions to someone else’s actions or words that have established the bitterness within our self.

There are many instances in our life which are seemingly harmless angers or insignificant sarcasms, but never the less, they are instilled within. We will see that this bitterness is a poison and grows within ourselves creating deeper channels of strife and problems in our life.

Because Christians have to live in this world and see so much wrong, so much sin, we have tendencies to harbor bitterness towards these destructive acts. We condemn the sinner and not the sin. This lack of understanding becomes a stumbling block in our life.

Bitterness of this kind has no place in our hearts. We must diligently pray and study the Word for knowledge and understanding so that we can have peace in our hearts knowing God’s Will and intentions in matters such as this.

We will be looking at the definitions of bitterness and related words in the English, Hebrew, and Greek dictionaries. There are many words that describe bitterness in its depths.

In some instances because of the subtly in which they work, we must take the time to think about these definitions and apply them to our current condition of our heart. Many of these harbored feelings or bitterness’ can stem from long ago. We must address ALL of these feelings and determine if possible where the root of bitterness stems from in these instances.

Bitterness in the Websters English dictionary states;

Bitterness is the state or quality of being bitter; figuratively, extreme enmity; sharpness; severity of temper; biting sarcasm; painful affliction; deep distress of mind.

Since bitterness is the state of being bitter. Lets look at the definition of bitter.

1) sharp; cruel; severe, as bitter enmity.

2) sharp; reproachful; sarcastic; as, bitter words.

3) painful to the mind; calamitous; poignant; as a bitter fate.

4) afflicted; distressed; as, to make one’s life bitter.

5) sharp to the feeling; piercing; painful; as, a bitter cold day, or bitter blast.

6) hurtful, very sinful.

7) mournful; distressing; expressive of misery; as, a bitter complaint or lamentation.

Take time to focus on these 7 points and remember that there can be various degrees in severity in these symptoms. They are again;

Deep distress of the mind

Severity of temper

Biting sarcasm

Distresses

Bitter words

Painful to the mind

Misery or bitter complaint

Lets look at a couple of scriptures on bitterness;

Eph 4:31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

Heb 12:15 Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;

In the Greek, defiled is to taint or contaminate. Bitterness in the Hebrew is to make bitter and has a base meaning of “to trickle”. Bitterness in the Greek is acridity (especially poison), sharp, (through the idea of piercing) with a base meaning of “set up”.

So we can see how contamination or this tainting of poison trickles within us and can work in a subtle way. Bitterness is a poison that “roots” itself deep within ones soul. Satan loves to work within the depths of our soul on a subtle basis. So this “trickle” of “poison” can slowly grow into stronger bitterness and often times it finds itself filtering into other areas of ones life. Stronghold after stronghold Satan works to destroy your soul to gain more “ground” or “control” over your soul.

Proverbs 14:10 tells us;

Prov 14:10 The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.

James 3:14 But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth.

We must be honest with ourselves and search our soul so that we can become free from this oppression. We may claim no bitterness towards someone from some past event but deep down inside is there bitterness?

There may be bitterness that we have forgotten about or is hidden within. This “tainting” of our personality, this “trickle of poison” has made its way into our life and we “think” we are “normal” in this sense.

Lets look the example of; “sarcasm” or “biting words”. Various forms of sarcasm seem “normal” among American society. We are “conditioned” by society tailored by its current morality or “normal” behavior if you will. If sarcasm is brought about in a comedic way, as in MOST cases, does this mean that sarcasm is OK because its funny?

What about bitterness towards God?

Again we may “think” we do not harbor bitterness towards God but do we? Have you searched your heart?

God’s Word states in Acts 8:23, For I perceive that thou art in the gall of bitterness, and in the bond of iniquity.

“Gall of bitterness” in the English dictionary is a state of extreme impiety or enmity to God.

As Simon harbored a bitterness towards God, we must also examine ourselves for bitterness towards God.

Now that we have a greater understanding into the depths of bitterness through these definitions and through the Word, we can take time to think about our “condition” of our heart. We can think about times of the past in events that could have led us to bitterness.

Do you know if bitterness has been handed down to you through your parents in generational sin?

Ex 34:7 Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children’s children, unto the third and to the fourth generation.

We can petition God in prayer and if need be in fasting. God can open our minds and free ourselves from the oppression of bitterness.

As I mentioned before a “conditioning” of “normal” behavior. This as well from our parents in ways of subtlety that we have heard from early life on in simple everyday use of angers or sarcasms. We can become freed from these sinful natures.

God can heal anyone, anytime, in any illness. God can and WILL change your heart. God WILL take the bitterness away so that you can forgive ANY act that caused the bitterness.

Lets address forgiveness;

Forgiveness

Forgive in the Websters English dictionary states;

1to give up resentment against or the desire to punish; stop being angry with; pardon

2to give up all claim to punish or exact penalty for (an offense); overlook

3to cancel or remit (a debt)

Lets look closer at the 3rd definition of forgiveness. To cancel or remit a debt;

If someone owes you money and repayment is long over due, or you know you will never receive the money, have you canceled the debt in your mind? Are you bitter over the matter?

If you have “forgiven” the debt in your mind and know you will never be repaid, or think that you will not be and vowed never to lend to this person again, have you truly “forgiven” them?

If you truly CANCELED the debt, and the party approached you wanting to borrow again would you do it?

If you don’t lend to them again, would that mean you never really forgave them?

These experiences have a detrimental effect on our lives but are allowed by God so that we can grow to understand HIS ways and become closer to God through our obedience.

There are many examples of how forgiveness would seem unheard of by man. But with God and his abounding mercy and grace we can live in joy and peace with Christ having carried all our burdens.

I have seen forgiveness to those that have inflicted physical harm with lifelong scars. I’ve seen forgiveness in rape. I cannot imagine forgiveness for such acts without the help of God!

Gen 50:17-20 So shall ye say unto Joseph, Forgive, I pray thee now, the trespass of thy brethren, and their sin; for they did unto thee evil: and now, we pray thee, forgive the trespass of the servants of the God of thy father. And Joseph wept when they spake unto him. And his brethren also went and fell down before his face; and they said, Behold, we be thy servants. And Joseph said unto them, Fear not: for am I in the place of God? But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.

This story of how Joseph treated his brothers after what they did to him is amazing. We would have harbored great bitterness and most likely hatred towards them. Joseph knew just how awesome God and His powers really are and God revealed to Joseph what he must do. The impact that Joseph in this forgiveness truly must have had an awesome impact on the lives of his brothers.(See Gen.45:5-15 Gen 50:19-21)

How can we understand to hate the sin, not the sinner. To forgive acts that most would say are unforgivable?

If we cannot forgive what are we saying? Are we saying that God is not fair in judgment?

In essence, not forgiving ALL those that sin against us is like us telling God we do not trust His hand in dealing “justly” in a situation.

Why would we choose to become judge, retain the sin, the pain, and judgment upon ourselves? This affects our relationship with God?

1John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Luke 23:33-35 And when they were come to the place, which is called Calvary, there they crucified him, and the malefactors, one on the right hand, and the other on the left. Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots. And the people stood beholding. And the rulers also with them derided him, saying, He saved others; let him save himself, if he be Christ, the chosen of God.

Christ told his Father to forgive them because they knew NOT what they did.

Its obvious that “they” thought they knew what they were doing but not understanding living for God they had no real knowledge of their actions. Living in the world is being blind in life because life does not begin until one chooses to serve God and HIS Kingdom… here on earth.

Mark 11:25-26 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.

Matt 18:21-22 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

Prov 25:21-22 If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink: For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the LORD shall reward thee.

Matt 5:39-41 But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloke also. And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.

Matt 5:43-46 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust. For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?

When we create this bitterness in others we must amend these ill-actions asking for forgiveness in such behavior. Forgiveness must be addressed directly to the person if at all possible. If that is not an option, a phone call or letter asking for forgiveness needs to done. Although this is not easy to do, you will be amazed at the peace God instills within your heart after such amends are made. The other person may not even forgive you but your words will dwell deep within their heart and they may not “verbally” tell you that you are forgiven. God will work their heart. We can also look at the other side of this…

A person that you addressed for forgiveness realizes that this action shows a very strong positive character trait that truly is admirable. If there is a way that God can be mentioned within the petition of forgiveness, this plants a seed that undoubtedly will have an impact on your “godliness” and “glorification” TO our Father…

Have you forgiven YOURSELF? Take the time to make sure you hold no bitterness towards actions you are accountable for that have weakened or deteriorated your “self-worth”..

Clearing our life of all bitterness takes a lot of preparation in thought. These issues must be dealt with to clear all bitterness from your soul. Diligence in prayer, and petitioning God is vitally important. You may need God’s strength to approach someone in the forgiveness. Forgiveness comes from our heart as well as from God and He has His ways of changing your heart or strengthening you so that forgiveness is possible in ALL instances of your life… thus a renewing of your soul takes place.

Again…

What is truly amazing about our relationship with God is in knowing that in whatever problem or situation we are in, God is here to help and Christ is here to heal. If our heart is not right, He will fix it. If we have not enough strength, God will give it to us. In whatever we lack, when we take these things to God through prayer and in some cases fasting, we WILL get results. God knows our heart and our will to serve Him. The rest is up to you in your perseverance in obedience and works for the Lord.

The depths of bitterness holds no boundary in any particular action directly or indirectly affecting you. Whether it be with family, friends, acquaintances, enemies or people we don’t even know. One needs to search depth of one’s soul to bring buried bitterness to light.

(3) FOOTNOTES:

Additional scripture and definitions for bitterness/forgiveness.

Eph 1:7

In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace;

Col 3:12-17

Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.

Luke 6:27-45

But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you. And unto him that smiteth thee on the one cheek offer also the other; and him that taketh away thy cloke forbid not to take thy coat also. Give to every man that asketh of thee; and of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again. And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise. For if ye love them which love you, what thank have ye? for sinners also love those that love them. And if ye do good to them which do good to you, what thank have ye? for sinners also do even the same. And if ye lend to them of whom ye hope to receive, what thank have ye? for sinners also lend to sinners, to receive as much again. But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil. Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven: Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again. And he spake a parable unto them, Can the blind lead the blind? shall they not both fall into the ditch? The disciple is not above his master: but every one that is perfect shall be as his master. And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but perceivest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Either how canst thou say to thy brother, Brother, let me pull out the mote that is in thine eye, when thou thyself beholdest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of thine own eye, and then shalt thou see clearly to pull out the mote that is in thy brother’s eye. For a good tree bringeth not forth corrupt fruit; neither doth a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. For every tree is known by his own fruit. For of thorns men do not gather figs, nor of a bramble bush gather they grapes. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.

Matt 5:1-12

And seeing the multitudes, he went up into a mountain: and when he was set, his disciples came unto him: And he opened his mouth, and taught them, saying, Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled. Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God. Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.

Acts 26:14-20

And when we were all fallen to the earth, I heard a voice speaking unto me, and saying in the Hebrew tongue, Saul, Saul, why persecutest thou me? it is hard for thee to kick against the pricks. And I said, Who art thou, Lord? And he said, I am Jesus whom thou persecutest. But rise, and stand upon thy feet: for I have appeared unto thee for this purpose, to make thee a minister and a witness both of these things which thou hast seen, and of those things in the which I will appear unto thee; Delivering thee from the people, and from the Gentiles, unto whom now I send thee, To open their eyes, and to turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan unto God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins, and inheritance among them which are sanctified by faith that is in me. Whereupon, O king Agrippa, I was not disobedient unto the heavenly vision: But shewed first unto them of Damascus, and at Jerusalem, and throughout all the coasts of Judaea, and then to the Gentiles, that they should repent and turn to God, and do works meet for repentance.

2 Cor 2:1-11

But I determined this with myself, that I would not come again to you in heaviness. For if I make you sorry, who is he then that maketh me glad, but the same which is made sorry by me? And I wrote this same unto you, lest, when I came, I should have sorrow from them of whom I ought to rejoice; having confidence in you all, that my joy is the joy of you all. For out of much affliction and anguish of heart I wrote unto you with many tears; not that ye should be grieved, but that ye might know the love which I have more abundantly unto you. But if any have caused grief, he hath not grieved me, but in part: that I may not overcharge you all. Sufficient to such a man is this punishment, which was inflicted of many. So that contrariwise ye ought rather to forgive him, and comfort him, lest perhaps such a one should be swallowed up with overmuch sorrow. Wherefore I beseech you that ye would confirm your love toward him. For to this end also did I write, that I might know the proof of you, whether ye be obedient in all things. To whom ye forgive any thing, I forgive also: for if I forgave any thing, to whom I forgave it, for your sakes forgave I it in the person of Christ; Lest Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices.

Forgiveness in the Greek Concordance says;

NT:859 aphesis (af’-es-is); from NT:863; freedom; (figuratively) pardon: KJV – deliverance, forgiveness, liberty, remission. NT:863 aphiemi (af-ee’-ay-mee); from NT:575 and hiemi (to send; an intens. form of eimi, to go); to send forth, in various applications (as follow): KJV – cry, forgive, forsake, lay aside, leave, let (alone, be, go, have), omit, put (send) away, remit, suffer, yield up. NT:575 apo (apo’); a primary particle; “off,” i.e. away (from something near), in various senses (of place, time, or relation; literal or figurative): KJV – (X here-) after, ago, at, because of, before, by (the space of), for (-th), from, in, (out) of, off, (up-) on (-ce), since, with. In composition (as a prefix) it usually denotes separation, departure, cessation, completion, reversal, etc.

DEFILED in the Greek is;miaino (me-ah’-ee-no); perhaps a primary verb; to sully or taint, i.e. contaminate (cer. or morally)

BITTERNESS (Hebrew)

mar (mar); or (feminine) marah (maw-raw’); from 4843; bitter (literally or figuratively); also (as noun) bitterness, or (adverbially) bitterly: KJV– + angry, bitter (-ly, -ness), chafed, discontented, X great, heavy. marar (maw-rar’); a primitive root; properly, to trickle [see 4752]; but used only as a denominative from 4751; to be (causatively, make) bitter (literally or figuratively): KJV– (be, be in, deal, have, make) bitter (-ly, -ness), be moved with choler, (be, have sorely, it) grieved (-eth), provoke, vex.

BITTERNESS (Greek)

4088 pikria (pik-ree’-ah); from 4089; acridity (especially poison), literally or figuratively: KJV– bitterness. 4089 pikros (pik-ros’); perhaps from 4078 (through the idea of piercing); sharp (pungent), i.e. acrid (literally or figuratively): KJV– bitter.

4078 pegnumi (payg’-noo-mee); a prolonged form of a primary verb (which in its simpler form occurs only as an alternate in certain tenses); to fix (“peg”), i.e. (specially) to set up (a tent): KJV– pitch.

(3) Additional verses for; God-Christ-Holy Spirit-Kingdom; Is Within Us.

2Co 6:16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Also See; (2Co. 6:16-17) (Eph. 2:21-22) (1Co.3:9)

1Co 6:19-20 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.

Eph 2:21-22 In whom all the building fitly framed together groweth unto an holy temple in the Lord: In whom ye also are builded together for an habitation of God through the Spirit. (Also see; 1 Co 3:9)

Col 1:27 To whom God would make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles; which is Christ in you, the hope of glory:

1Jn 5:20 And we know that the Son of God is come, and hath given us an understanding, that we may know him that is true, and we are in him that is true, even in his Son Jesus Christ. This is the true God, and eternal life.

1Co 1:30 But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption:

Rom 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

1Co 12:27 Now ye are the body of Christ, and members in particular.

2Co 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

1Co 3:9 For we are labourers together with God: ye are God’s husbandry, ye are God’s building